Wedding - Shedding, Shaadi-Vaadi

I had been to a wedding today with Tani and my friend, Arpana and her son Aditya. Watching the two kiddos reminded me of all the weddings we went to when we were kids.. and so here I am!!!

Anybody who has been even remotely associated with a Pattar family will know the importance of a "Kalyanam" (wedding in Iyer lingo). It's the mother of all affairs, more important than electing the country's PM or surviving a tsunami. Parents get their children dressed, themselves dressed and the hours spent discussing what sari to wear will probably make Gandhiji turn in his grave (not that he has one, but you get the point :)). Women take the frontseat here, bustling about, picking out clothes for their hapless husbands who follow merely because there won't be any food cooked at home on that day... besides the "booffaayy" chaapaadu is worth it!

For us kids, luckily, we had a whole battalion of weddings to attend thanks to so many mamas and chittis getting married one after the other (yes, they were planned that way!). Sandy, Shilpu and me got to attend a lot of them, our whole focus was on dressing up... this was the one time you got to wear nailpolishes, "leefteeks", jewellery and look cool...! Mahalaxmi Mami (Sandy's mom) was our default lipstick person, she had the best shades in her handbag. We would get to wear them after ALL dressing and eating was done, before going to the hall. Post the lipstick application, we wouldn't let the upper lip and lower lip touch each other even while swallowing SALIVA!!! This is because the lipstick would run off otherwise... LOL!!

Once we were at the hall, there would be a mad dash to sit next to the poor bride and groom so that we would come in the "video". Not complying with this rule would lead to cold stares and tight pinches from our mothers who thought that coming in the video was "visible proof" that we have attended the wedding (Honestly, I really don't think the bride and groom could care less, but their parents would for some weird reason). There would also be a competition of sorts between kids from the girl's side and boy's side. This not only applied to videos but also to playing outside & eating.

When there's a wedding in the family, then what fun!! We kids got first preference when it came to clothes. Sandy, Shilpa and I were always "band baajaa" (same clothes, in different colors). I remember Virmani Mama's wedding, the "pavadais"... the material came from Madras (now Chennai). I got a peacock blue one with a dark blue border (temple style), Sandy got the parrot green one with identical color border, Shilpu got a rose colored one with same border. But there was a problem. Sandy's and mine had golden "buttas", Shilpus' did not!!! Big issue...!! Shilpu was weeping, mine is not same as theirs, you are leaving me out, I am the odd one... and so on. My parents were in a fix, trying to tell her its ok, Sandy and I being the bad ones were smirking, while trying to look sympathetic. Well, my grandma had her way and sent the material back with a neighbor to Chennai and got another rose colored one with the same buttas and border for Shilpu!!!! Can ya beat that??

Now, there's the food thing.. Shilps and Sandy hated curds, I loved it! When the "thayiru pachadi" guy would come, they would say no, put their hands over their elais while I would ask that mama to put thayiru pachadi for those two, which would get them really upset! Once, I fooled Shilpu by saying that the Mango Kadi (Mambaya Morkootan) was actually payasam and she allowed the Mama to put it in her elai... then threw up and I got into a whole lotta trouble with my grandma for that. He He He...! I would like to add some stuff here about people's eating habits we would observe.. but will refrain (Sandy, Shilpu, Vidya will know what I am talking about).

The best part is those memories you form. As a child, you are least bothered about fashion, dress sense, the heat, the good food, the bad food... etc. You really aren't bothered about the bride and groom either. All you care about is meeting other kids and having a blast, playing cricket with laddoos and stuffing as many flowers as you can in your hair.

We still have those pavadais (south indian ghaghra cholis), the dresses that we got for Mina Akka's wedding (hey, Gokul atim actually called us "models"... we were in cloud nine after that!!) and Virmani Mama's wedding are still around somewhere. They were priceless for us, probably because that was the only other time we got new outfits (apart from Diwali and birthdays).

And probably, because a wedding to us, was a party to attend... a child's innocence.... an adult's misconception....